I used to pride myself in being ultraproductive. I’d start every day with a checklist I thought was bringing me closer to the life I wanted. I’d end every day with the last task ticked off! Everyone was asking me about my secret and I was telling them to go read the ‘7 Habits of Highly Effective People’. Until one day, I sat down in front of my laptop and felt something was off. I was feeling pressured, as if I was some sort of machine, a prisoner of my own checklist. I decided to look into it, took a day away from people and technology and dug into myself.
What I uncovered was a gap between how I appeared in the world and how I felt on the inside. That gap was costing me most of my energy. Half of it went to maintaining an image of happiness and success in front of myself and others. The other half went to dealing with the pressure and fear of failure lying underneath. I was keeping busy, but feeling stuck. Somehow my sense of purpose, progress and happiness were lost somewhere in that gap.
When I asked myself why I was afraid to fail, I detected an underlying belief: “The world which we have created for ourselves is out to get us. It’s out to get ME! Armed with unhealthy food, facebook & mobile phone addictions, stressful work, consumerism and my own unborn babies. They’ll all make sure I get weaker, fail, suffer and get even weaker, in an endless downward spiral of doom.”
I changed!!! Or did I?
I had planned a trip to SE Asia and thought the change of scenery would do the trick. So I settled in Bali, ditched my checklist, started enjoying life and hoped for the best. The moment I started thinking of creating something new, however, the fear came up again. I worked on my awareness and constructive use of that fear through meditation and shamanic drum journeying.
I thought I had to accept my fear, because that’s what we do with negative emotions, right?
I didn’t know how wrong I was until I got lucky with a free one-on-one coaching session with Laura Fredrickson. It was about ‘shifting my shiz around money’ . The topic was relevant to me and I jumped at the opportunity out of curiosity. With 18+ years of coaching, she managed to break my resistance to being coached with a snap of her fingers and show me how to work on the beliefs that were driving my fears. I decided to do the unthinkable – address my worries around the money I felt I was running out of by spending a huge lump of cash on an experienced high-profile coach. Just 1 month later I had the evidence that it was the best investment I’d ever made.
Unexpected shift of gears
On my 4th call with Laura, after a lot of work we did together, she told me that my impatience was the only thing holding me back from stepping in my power. After the call, I headed out for a walk. I was feeling impatient with my impatience, moving at a fast pace, wondering when the pressure was finally going to let me go. And then something suddenly shifted. My pace slowed down.
It dawned on me that my body’s desire to walk like crazy, 2h/day for the last 15 years, was actually a deeper intelligence within me. That intelligence was balancing off the pressure my head was generating by insisting that I walk, taking time to slow down and not have to do things. I broke down in tears of gratitude for my body and the wisdom of the life-force driving it, caught completely off-guard by a sudden rise of emotions. I thought it was just a momentary thing, but it stayed.
Not only did I take up a weird habit of crying with joy, love and gratitude every other day, but my entire baseline of being shifted. 95% of the self-doubt, worry, impatience and pressure I felt regularly and accepted as normal were replaced with appreciation, self-love, trust and empowerment!
An easier way with money was a side-effect, a small part of it. It was something much bigger than this, something I wouldn’t have even known to ask for as I wouldn’t know how it feels or that it’s even possible. I’d call it a sense of empowerment and resilience, a completely new way of living my life. A new baseline of being.
Why did I decide to coach others?
The beauty and the depth of the space that coaching generates to connect to transform together with another human being was beyond anything else I’d experienced before. After receiving it, I decided to offer coaching to my friends and see whether it might be something I’d enjoy doing myself. For the first time in my life, I found what it’s like to come out of a 1 hour call with someone and feel pure joy running through my body. At first, I couldn’t believe it was possible, I always thought work was supposed to be tiring! But it kept happening again and again and I realised this is what happens when you do what you love and you immediately see the impact of your work on yourself and others.
So I decided to go forward with it – in the months after I shot the video above, I worked hard juggling between coaching client work, learning from masters of psychology, spirituality, soul craft and group work and creating my signature process for free spirits on a journey of purpose. I can’t tell you how excited and honoured I am to be doing this kind of work, to be connecting with amazing people and supporting them in crafting their unique path to a soulful life of purpose and empowerment. Which brings me back to you – I’d love to talk with you about it and see how it can be of service to you too!
Curious to know more? How does this work? What is a challenge worth addressing in this way? Is it it general life stuff or can it be focused on something specific? What kind of investment of time/money would it require?
I believe the best way to answer all your questions is to experience coaching for yourself. Which is why I’d like to offer you an opportunity just like the one I had – a 1 hour gifted session you can apply for now.
I look forward to connecting with you soon!